Friday, February 14, 2014

i Quit

My last posting, i addressed my concern on my Futsal retirement. 

Quitting something never easy. But you have choice. You always can choose for your self. Since when you can't decide for your self? You always do. Always can. Always deserve. As long as you do not break any law or rule especially from religious aspect. 

A friend told me, the famous boxer Mohamed Ali when retired was asked, "What are you doing next?". He replied with sentences which the world may not expected. "When I knocked-out John Fraizer, i did please many people around the world. Maybe the world but actually why did i care? Does Allah cares who was my opponent and what did I do in the ring? Now I am out of the ring. I just want to please Him".

The above story told us, you always have choice for your self including to quit anything you choose to. Mohamed Ali quitted his. As long as the choice did not guide you astray. So do I. So do you. And, why you left may not be important but get it done (left) could be important. Isn't it? Some more who really cares on the facts of it? And asking what you really want? This friend also told me, you eat... what you can only chew. And move on.

I quitted the hobby I loved the most. I had been in the 'industry' for 10 years. I did not build an empire but I was known as Along Futsal for those period. I dreamed of big ambitious those days. But big dream 'thirst' giant strength. That is what I might lack of.  I build three generations of Futsal Players from 2006-2011. Some of them are playing in the prestige's league now. But, I left Futsal. So, what makes me myself, or others to think it is impossible to quit something that I have worked in a lesser period than that? Sometimes things doesn't work our way. The values the boys had might not the same as me. But 'kanak-kanak umpama kain putih' and I did not aware of having them as a team also made me a responsible leader, brother, and guardian. Some of them had been with me since they were 10 and 11 years old. Thank you to their parents for letting them to be guard by a 'budak hingusan' as me. Anyway, those Futsal boys reached great achievement in their career . Something you can put on your hall of fame wall. Although they are not with me any more. Kids, also have choice :). And they proved me wrong. They can achieve anything because they hold the right values, attitudes and stay focus. Congrato!!

I am glad and thankful to God for what I am having now. I believe I did not go through the same path as many of my school mates but I also believe some of them might dream the path I had. So if people asked me if I have chance to turn back the time, which path would I choose and what would I fix? I will choose the same path because from this path I had learned mountains of mistakes. Fixing the old mistakes would not bring the person I am today. A full of mistake person so we always look to own self-mistake before fix another's mistakes. Thank god. 

But in this life, we, choose. And I choose to quit some thing that I think I could not bear anymore. That I think it is not fit for me to work on it any more. That I have no more heart to do. That I know I could not commit. And I believe commitment always come with responsibility. 

"Indeed, we offered the Trust to the heavens and the earth and the mountains, and they declined to bear it and feared it; but man [undertook to] bear it. Indeed, he was unjust and ignorant." Surah Al-Ahzab  72

("Sesungguhnya Kami telah tawarkan amanah itu kepada langit, bumi dan gunung-ganang, tetapi mereka enggan memikulnya dan mereka khuatir tentangnya, tetapi dipikul dia oleh manusia. Sesungguhnya (manusia) itu sangat zalim lagi bodoh. “ - Al-Ahzab: 72)

Therefore, I am not fit to be there anymore. They could be thousands of reasons but enough always be enough. This below statement from former Malaysia Hockey team, might help me explain a bit further when he, also quit.

"I was called as selfish and refuse to face the challenges together. (however) I will be selfish if I am to stay because at this current time I know I could not give my 100% best to the team"

(Saya dianggap mementingkan diri sendiri dan tidak mahu bersama menggalas cabaran. Saya akan menjadi seorang yang mementingkan diri sendiri jika tidak melepaskan jawatan ini kerana dengan keadaan sekarang, saya tidak mampu memberikan seratus peratus yang terbaik kepada pasukan". - Paul Revington)

Malaysia Hockey Confederation then took step to move on with the replacement of Revington announced. Why would Malaysians call him selfish while for him, a selfish person will enjoy all the facilities, good salary and being popular while he knows he would not perform his best? 

I hope I will quit with the respected way and not to be populist. I don't know how people can announce their retirement and easily take it back. Even Tun Dr. Mahathir Mohamad took his moment to take it back with condition he will be given some period of time to continue his duty and the fact and the date which he decide to step down must be agreed. He, did it his way. Well, I am not Dr. Mahathir. I, have my own way.

I always believe in leadership by example. Not talking one thing and do another. 

I watched a Hindustan's movie. Can't recall the title. The hero use this line to describe himself:

'What I say, I do . What I do not say, definitely I do.'



p/s: credit to a friend. He told another friend that we should write at least if not for public but for ourselves. So we can always have reference in the future. Our anak, cucu, also can. He told that friend in front of me. And I learned from it . Life is simple, sometimes I complicate it :)